Why dont golfers ever eat pie. Its easy to tell a real dedicated doctor.
Ben Hogan Your target is your goal.
Golf one liners. Golf Jokes One Liners. Heres our top golf one liners perfect for a few extra laughs around the course. Especially if you struggle to remember the longer jokes.
If you like the longer longer jokes check out our selection of clean golf jokes here or if you arent easily offended our rude golf jokes are here. Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly and the golfers lie well. Two longtime golf buddies were standing on a tee box overlooking a river getting ready to hit their tee shots.
One golfer pointed down the river turned to the other golfer and said Look at those idiots fishing in the rain. Funny Golf One Liners 2021. You know youre a hack when your divot flies farther than your ball.
Real golfers have two handicaps. One for braggin and one for betting. If you golf on election day be sure to cast an absent-tee ballot.
I enjoy shooting in the 120s. The only thing golfers love more than golf is some funny golf jokes. These un-fore-gettable puns one-liners and jokes will have you rolling on the green between putts and can ease the pain of a bad round.
The best part is if no one laughs at your golf pun you can call a mulligan and try the next one. Golf Jokes One Liners. Over the years golf has brought a lot of enjoyment to millions of people including Presidents Celebrities and Golfers alike so in this article golf jokes one liners I have scoured the internet to find some of the best ones for you some of them are tongue in cheek but none the less humorous and witty Enjoy.
Short funny golf jokes - one liners. The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t she asked the instructor.
P-u-t-t is correct he replied. Put means to place a thing where you want it. Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing Golf is what you play when youre too out of shape.
Golf Slogans One-liners. Golf is our favorite game. Hit it find it and hit it again.
Play strong or go home. Believe and Achieve. Play like a champion today.
A Golfer loves green. Hit it long. Its just hard to play.
The most important shot in golf is the next one. Ben Hogan Your target is your goal. Keep calm and Golf on.
Thats how I roll. Most people play a fair game of golf if you watch them. 1911 1999 comedian author columnist.
I thought youd be the man to beat this year. I guess youll just have to keep beating yourself. A man and his friend meet at the clubhouse to play a round of golf together.
The man has a little dog with him and on the first green when the man holes out a 20-foot putt. The little dog starts to yip and stands up on its hind legs. The friend is quite amazed.
That dog is really talented. Best Golf Jokes One-Liners 1. Golf is an easy game its just hard to play 2.
An American went to Scotland and played golf with a newly acquainted Scottish golfer. After a bad tee shot he played a Mulligan which was an extremely good one. He then asked the Scottish What do you call a Mulligan in Scotland We call it 3.
Here are some hilarious golf jokes about how hard it is to do well when youre playing golf. After a particularly poor round a golfer spotted a lake as he walked despondently up the 18th. He looked at his caddie and said Ive played so badly all day I think Im going to drown myself in that lake.
My stockbrokers a golf nut. One day he called up and he said Guess what. I just broke 80.
I said I know. Im one of them Our minister was the best golfer in town. Look at all the practice hes had in keeping his head down.
Its easy to tell a real dedicated doctor. He can never understand how a hooker can be happy. Or if you are looking for a shorter joke Heres my selection of golfing one liners.
Caddie tips After shooting 30 over par after 18 holes Bob is on his way home from the 18 th having a chat with his Caddie. Depending on the type of service we will allow renting Golf One Liners with different conditions. If you have a demand for renting Golf One Liners service you can contact us directly via our email telephone we will give more detailed information about conditionsThe results of Golf One Liners are always available on our site.
Golf balls are like eggs. Theyre white they are sold by the dozen and a week later you have to buy more. Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly and the golfers lie well.
A golfer who says he never cheats is also a liar. Golf is what you play when youre too out of shape to play softball. List of Golf Jokes and humor culled from TV shows films stand-up comedy and pop culture.
These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at Golf Jokes from a variety of perspectives and try to find humor in wry observations through irony and sarcasm and even just by being silly. Human beings love to laugh and being able to. Golf Puns and Funny One-Liners.
Here are some gold quick funnies from ThoughtCo. Golf is a lot like taxes. You go for the green and wind up in the hole.
Im sick and tired of your obsession with golfHusband. Why is it driving a wedge between us. Best Golf One-Liners Part II Joke.
Not every great golf line is uttered by someone famous. These anonymous jewels are sure to tickle the funny bone. I dont want to accuse him of cheating but once he had a hole-in-one and scored it as a zero.
Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. These golf puns and one-liners will putt a smile on your face see what we did there 1. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants.
In case he got a hole in one. You made an 11 on a Par 3 hole. How the heck did that happen.
I chipped in from the rough. Why dont golfers ever eat pie. Go back in time and start playing at a younger age.
It takes a lot of balls to play golf knowing youre a bad golfer. Your game is so bad you had to have your ball retriever re-gripped. Babe Ruth once said It took me 17 years to get three thousand hits in baseball.
I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them. Jimmy DeMaret Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child.
Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. John Updike Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad. You can explore golf stroke birdie reddit one liners including funnies and gags.
Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean golf stroke minigolf dad jokes. There are also golf stroke puns for kids 5 year olds boys and girls.